WIDE OPEN SPACES

I'm not a risk taker by nature. In the past I would avoid failure on any level. Since as long as I can remember there was an unpleasant voice in my head that would tell me "don't even try it...you'll just fail". So, I always played it smooth. I would always tell others that I didn't enjoy playing that game, just to avoid the embarrassment. I didn't know if I enjoyed the game or not, because I had never played the game. But safer seemed better than enjoyment might have and a heck of a lot better than humiliation. I think that voice in my head must have started when I was in the bassinet. I don't remember ever being without it, at least not until Love rescued me.

Since that time I have found myself, little by little, exposing my fear of failure to His light. Each time I do, that voice gets a little quieter. I like that! To be honest, even writing this blog is a great risk to me. I have wrestled between doing what I feel Love has asked me to do and fear that I have nothing of value to say, which being interpreted would be FAILURE!  There, I put it down on paper (well a screen actually), but somehow I feel a relief just having said it. So while I am at it, I will apologize in advance for poor grammar and sentence structures too! I really don't know if what I am trying to convey to you as the reader is truly able, with all my flaws, to penetrate off of this screen and into your heart, but that is my desire. But even more importantly than that, I believe it is His desire. Therefore, I am willing to take the risk.

I recently took a great risk! I took a chance of trying something that was totally out of my comfort zone. I knew if it worked, I would really enjoy the outcome. Well, it didn't. Pretty much a failure! To be honest, I'm glad I tried it. Because in the failures I have to go back to square one and find out what truth really is. Truth is my value is not defined the way the world teaches. It is not defined by the number on my bathroom scales, or how cohesive my boards look on Pinterest. Being accepted by my peers or even those I love doesn't define my value. Even I don't define my value! Our value is determined by The One who created us and how valuable we are to Him. He settled that on the cross over two thousand years ago!

That unpleasant voice that had tracked me from the bassinet caused me to create very, very tight boundaries in my life. Until Love came, my way was very dark and narrow. I missed out on all kinds of things that would most assuredly, have brought me joy and possibly others as well. When Love came He dug up those fence post and has set them out further than my eyes can see. The field between here and there has both hills and valleys, but both are strewn with the most inviting array of wildflowers. Colors that I had never seen on the dark narrow path. Love's boundaries are not designed to limit us or diminish our lives. His boundaries invite us to see just how far we can go!