Easter Forever Changed My Life

I remember the first time someone called me a melancholy. I felt my soul and all of it's heaviness had been hung up for everyone to see. I think until that moment I thought I had hidden it pretty well behind a smile and kindness and concern for others. It was at a Ladies Bible Study and I had somehow just had the huge success of getting three toddlers fed, dressed, dressed again and put into car seats and then hurled into their assigned classrooms. We were quite the show everywhere we went. Three little blondie's with matching bows and shoes and socks and a raggedy mother who hadn't slept all night in over 5 years. It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.

But melancholy, really? It sounded so depressing...and I was. To be honest a heaviness of sorts had followed me since my earliest memories. Childhood in my own home growing up was not always the easiest. We were to be seen and not heard. The introspection of a melancholy can get real deep when there is no release. Deep feelers and thinkers need safe sounding boards. Maybe it was just me...but I always felt I was just a little "too much" for others so I held on to myself and my intense feelings pretty tightly. I think I still do. It wasn't until the true story of Easter morning had settled into my heart that I finally felt I had met Someone who was capable of handling me, all of me. The real me. For the first time I felt truly known. Truly accepted. Free just to be me. I was made for the deep things of God and I finally felt my ship had found it's harbor. 

It's taken Us a good thirty years to work through most of my messed up identity and value, but Love refused to let me stay where I was in my shameful confusion. To say He has become my very best friend would actually be an understatement. He has become my life! He gets me. He really gets me! I can be in a room of a hundred loved ones and I am still so very alone with Him. He's the quiet lover who waits patiently for me as I run to and fro in the bustle of being a caregiver to others. Waiting to walk me home under the silence of moon light after another beautiful day has come to a close. As I pull the covers up over me after another long day His breath lies close to mine and We dream together. I wake and find myself longing to run to the Love Letters He wrote me so long ago. I read them, over and over and they never lose their mystery, they never lose their ability to move my heart to places unknown. I could talk of His love and the million ways He makes Himself known to me on a daily basis for the rest of my life...and never have said enough. This world has very little to offer me in comparison to what He has already bestowed upon me. He's the wildest lover I have ever known! Thirty seven years of bliss and I still can't get enough of Him. It's the love story of eternity. The love story of all love stories. He's mine and He's yours. 

Everything changed that first Easter morning...Love came back from the dead with a vengeance, to find you, the real you...the "too much" you that no one else could handle, if you were to be the really real you. Don't leave Him waiting! It's so much more than just the romance of just a lifetime...it's the romance of an eternity!